Pages Of A Story

Midlife Magic, author, adult colouring book, Cannabis, teacher - Page Thirty-One - Kim's Story

January 27, 2023 Candy Dinsmore-Bekaan Season 2 Episode 1
Pages Of A Story
Midlife Magic, author, adult colouring book, Cannabis, teacher - Page Thirty-One - Kim's Story
Show Notes Transcript

This week's Guest is author Kim Sarsons!
Join us as she talks about self-care in midlife, overcoming a major health crisis, and navigating single motherhood while also keeping herself a priority.

You can find Kim's episode here: 
https://youtu.be/lVg6xJSfDOU
https://pagesofastory.buzzsprout.com/
www.pagesofastory.com

You can follow Kim here:
https://kimsarsonscoaching.com/
https://www.facebook.com/kim.sarsons/
https://www.instagram.com/kimesscoach
https://www.tiktok.com/@highonmidlife

Buy her colouring book here:
https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1778090966
Buy Midlife Magic here:
https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1778090915
Buy her experience journal here:
https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B09P7MGTQ6
_______________________________________________

Please subscribe and follow Pages Of A Story here:
https://linktr.ee/pagesofastory

#personalstories #pagesofastorypodcast #pagesofastory #lifeexperience #healing  #learning #growing #midlifemagic #author #canadianauthor #Cannabis #singlemotherhood #menopause

Hosted by Candy Dinsmore-Bekaan
Theme music by Matthew DeMeritt

Pages Of A Story episodes feature individuals' perspectives and opinions and should not be taken as advice on how to live your lives. Please enjoy and be safe.

If you are struggling please reach out to a healthcare professional or the suicide prevention hotline:
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800-273-8255
Canada Suicide Prevention Service: 833-456-4566

Candy: So, I am here with Kim. How are you? 


Kim: I'm great, thank you. How are you? 


Candy: I'm great too. I'm so glad that you're here. So, would you like to introduce yourself and tell us who you are? 


Kim: So, my name is Kim Sarsons and I reside in Calgary, Alberta. Western Canada. I'm a mom to a 16 year old, almost 17 year old daughter who, um, was just having singing practice and I told her, you have to stop ‘cause I'm about to go into a conversation here. The, the operatic tones were just filling up the whole house. Anyhow, um, yeah, so I'm a mom to a very talented 16 year old and I'm a retired school teacher. Just stepped away from 27 years of classroom teaching in 2022. Yeah, and I can now call myself a, an author ‘cause a large part of 2022 for me was about publishing, writing, and publishing.


Candy: So, you authored a book called Midlife Magic. What inspired you to write that book?


Kim: Uh, many things inspired me to go down that path of writing. Um, so in, well back up a few years in, in 2016, I found myself experiencing extreme burnout and, um, dealing with a medical emergency associated with that. And just overworking myself and put, uh, I ended up in the hospital for a number of weeks and had to undergo two major surgeries, and life was really complicated for a while.


Fortunately, I came out of it, but, uh, not without a lot of struggle. And it was about a year and a half after, like being on the other side of this, Cannabis legalization was approaching and I became very curious and I started to dig into what this plant was and, and what this new, uh, environment with Cannabis legalization might look like and even how I might be a part of it if I felt called to be a part of it. 


And I ended up finding, um, mentorship in an organization in a, in a educational community called the Cannabis Coaching Institute, which I know you are familiar with. Also a graduate, right? And I pursued coaching certification because as I learned more and more about the plant, I felt that I could invite it into my life in this mindful, well informed way with, with intention because while I was in my medical struggle, I was dealing with a lot of symptoms and, and, and, uh, physical things that I learned Cannabis could have supported me through, but I didn't have it. I didn't have it because it wasn't, I mean, it was legal, medically legal, but I didn't have a diagnosis, you know, nobody had mentioned it to me as a path to consider taking so that I could address things like my sleep issues, my pain, anxiety that I was dealing with. 


After when I was well and I was learning about Cannabis, I realized how powerful it could have been in my life, and it could have really supported me so much and prevented, uh, quite a bit of the suffering when I was going through recovery and between these two surgeries that I had to have.


So, in pursuing Cannabis coaching, it opened up this opportunity, this world for me to share Cannabis with other people, but, I was a school teacher and I didn't feel comfortable bringing the topic up. I, I didn't know what the response would be. Stigma was and continues to be very, very real because fundamentally people are stuck in the old paradigm about Cannabis being a gateway and, and just say no and all of that. I, I manifested the opportunity to write a book and I thought, what better topic than all that I had learned? And, um, decided to create a book focusing on Cannabis as a self-care tool for women in midlife ‘cause that's where I am, that's where I was at the time, and I just felt like there's gotta be more women who are struggling out there. I'm not, I wasn't the only one, obviously, who would benefit from this discreet, safe way of learning about Cannabis. Of course, when I was learning about it, there were a lot of books out there and and such, but there weren't many that really talked, I don't think there were any that really talked about women's health and, and, um, this particular phase of life and, and what is experienced over 40 and, you know, between about 40 and 60 years old. Decided to commit to, to publishing a book and it took about a year actually for it all to come together ‘cause I started writing it while I was still teaching full-time and it was a side project and so it just came, uh, into publication early last year, not quite a year ago. 


Candy: That's amazing. And I mean, you are, like you said, you're a single mother and you've been navigating parenthood for 16 years, you said? So, quite some time. Um, what is the most important thing that you've learned as a single mother navigating all of that? 


Kim: So, the biggest learnings around single parenthood, I would say would be remembering to commit time, energy, and effort to your own self-care. Um, that was something that I found really challenging to do because I had so many commitments. Parents who have partners experience similar things, but when you're running the, playing the role of two parents in one, taking responsibility for all of the child rearing, all of the, uh, associated expenses, everything by yourself, and, um, there isn’t like the shoulder to lean on or the person to, um, to consult with or that kind of thing, to, to deal with any sorts of problems. You end up carrying a lot of weight. A friend of mine lovingly says the ball and chain, that's what you call it, carrying the ball and chain all by yourself. 


What I've learned since being unwell, my daughter was 10, she was just 10 years old when I became sick. Just keeping my own composure and keeping, even though I was going through such a difficult time, I had to maintain serenity and I had to maintain a sense of it's, everything's gonna be okay and calm and all of that for her so that this wouldn't be a, a long and enduring traumatic experience for her, even though I know that it did imprint on her.


It was that, that phase where I started to really think about how I had not given myself the attention that I needed. You never expect yourself to get extremely critically ill like it, sometimes it just happens, right? It was kind of like a message from the universe telling me, Kim, you need to slow down. You need to stop doing the things the way that you're doing them and you need to start re, realigning, you know, your energies with what you need. 


‘Cause I was, uh, I took on a lot of different challenges when I was, this, like prior to becoming ill, I decided that the only way to, like, I decided that the only way to increase my income as a teacher was to go into administration, and the way to do that would be to get my master's degree.


So, while working full-time, parenting full-time, I decided I would take on a master's degree, which took me five years to do one course at a time. So, it was a very long slog through that. And yes, it bumped up my income slightly, but not enough for me to really notice and to, to feel like I had achieved this tremendous accomplishment.


I, I decided after getting sick that pursuing administration was not a path that I wanted to go down, ‘cause when I observed my colleagues who were in those roles and who the, like they were just burning themselves out. They were, you know, they say what? Lighting the candle at both ends. And, uh, I just decided, no, I, I, I completely changed my mind after that.


One of the things that I did, again, prior to getting sick, that was a big challenge was I decided that we would go and move to another country temporarily, and I did that because I wanted my daughter to learn a second language through immersion, and I was already a student of Spanish. I'd been studying it for a very, very long time and got to the point that I was able to teach it, and I really wanted her to grow up another language. And so I applied for a leave of absence from my job and we went and we lived in Uruguay in South America for 18 months. And you know, that was just an, an additional, I don't wanna call it a burden because I chose it and it was a tremendous experience, but it was highly stressful. 


If you can imagine going to another part of the world where you don't know anybody and you're trying to set up your life and put your child in school and do all of these things by yourself when you don't have any, any support. Like, this is the type of challenge that I would choose for myself and very exciting, but at the same time, you know, there can be a, a price to pay, and I did pay the price later on because it just, th - this was just the way I op, I operated. I would just continue to take on more and more and more.


The big learning has been through getting sick and realizing that I am actually an important person in my own life and that I need care and it, it's not a responsibility I should be putting on somebody else to be taking care of me. I need to make the time and the space to focus on my own wellbeing and when Cannabis came into the, into the picture, it was like, okay, this is a tremendous tool that I'll be able to use that will support that and allow for appropriate and, and, and, and quality functioning. Because you know, if you can't sleep well, you're not going to show up well the next day. You're not gonna feel happy. You're going to be stressed out and anxiety ridden. And then if there's pain, like there's all these different things that we kind of, we can sort of brush under the rug or, or medicate with over-the-counter medication and that kind of thing. That's being reactive as opposed to being proactive and the self-care that I, that I practice now is very much about being proactive and ‘cause I, I tell people I'm gonna live to be a hundred. More people are living, becoming centenarians, so why not? Um, so there's gotta be action for that. There's gotta be a plan in place to be able to meet those sorts of, of life goals. You gotta take care of you, otherwise you can't take care of anybody else very effectively, including, you know, your family and your colleagues and your responsibilities and everything else.


Candy: So, you mentioned self-care obviously. And self-care is different for everybody, right? What I do for my self care is different than what you do and vice versa. But what else, besides Cannabis, do you do for your self-care? 


Kim: One thing that I try to do on a daily basis is, and I don't always, but I try. I try to get out into nature. Fortunately, very near to my home, like three blocks away is a natural area with a stream running through it and a forest, and people generally only go through there with their dogs. I think I'm the only person that goes out walking that does not have a dog. I take my, I, I say I'd like to take my spirit for a walk. Um, so I like to get out in nature and just be in the fresh air and, and amongst the trees and, and the water and all of that. It's just calming, it's grounding, it's invigorating. It’s all of that at the same time. So I, I do that. 


I practice yoga, so I do yoga for the body, but I also do yoga for my face , which is a practice called face yoga.


Trying, you know, taking care of what I, what I eat and trying to be cognizant of eating well and all of that. But also, um, intentional self-care for me is about being in, in the company of the people that I care about. So, my friends and having that time together and just being in, in each other's company is always good for the soul. So, those are a few things that I do. 


Candy: So, in your book you compare midlife women with or, mid aged women, with teenage girls, and how there's so much connection between the two of them. Would you like to talk more about. 


Kim: Yeah, so it it's the phases, right? The teenage phase of change and, and coming into adulthood and the, and the midlife phase of transformation. Like, they both have to do with transformation and change, but the thing is, teenagers, like, they're very excited to grow up and to reach adulthood ultimately. Whereas women in midlife experience this transition a little bit differently because it, once you're midway through your life and you realize that you're on the, I don't wanna say the downhill, but you know, you're getting closer to the end, there's a different, it's not quite as exciting, I guess, but it can be. 


But what's similar? Um, so there's the hormones, right? Hormones are doing their thing. They're really coming into to play during those early teenage years and, and what they do to moods and the, you know, the pain with periods and all of that stuff is similar to what women go through, but at the opposite end with menopause. In, in the teenage years, the hormones are kicking in and in midlife with menopause, perimenopause, the, the hormone levels are starting to turn down. So, there's similarities where, you know, you're looking at maybe I, I guess teenagers aren't necessarily as insightful as more mature women, but you can see it if you have anyone who's watching this that has a teenage daughter, associate with this. Just that self discovery, that sense of self discovery that's happening. The unfolding, the going into a new phase, it's similar. It's like a milestone in life. 


In midlife there's this, there's this feeling that comes from society and the expectations of society that you're no longer relevant. You're not, because you're not as youthful as you used to be or you're not as youth youthful as what, um, the media tells you is, is socially good and acceptable. In midlife it's not like there's this celebration, right? Like, hooray, you made it to 50! I mean, I guess some people celebrate their 50th really huge, but…


Candy: I get what you're saying though. I do understand what you're saying and I think a lot of others will as well, because it does seem like, as, you know, childhood and, and teenagehood and, and moving upwards, going into all the new exciting things of getting a job, maybe getting married, having children, and then, you know. And then empty nest and then what? Instead of all these amazing possibilities that, yeah, and all these possibilities that can happen when you're older.


Kim: Yeah, so reframing the whole midlife attitude is, is one thing that I'm really interested in doing, and the, the idea of empowering. Of empowering women to see themselves differently, and this is where different practices, like when I mentioned the face yoga, face yoga is, is exercising the muscles of your face, so you're ultimately giving yourself a natural lift. So, because as you get older and your face is changing and you're looking in the mirror and you're not necessarily liking what you see, looking back, and this is relatable for, for girls in teenage life as well, they look in the mirror and they've got, you know, they've got breakouts or they've got different things that that that associate with their cycles and, and things and they're not happy with their appearances and like this is normal in both phases of life. Actually, it kind of accompanies us all through our lives. We have this kind of stress about what we look like. 


So in, by having tools that empower myself and that I can share to empower others is really, is really something that excites me because I just see more and ads for Botox and fillers and more and more. You know, there's so much that people are being convinced to do to make themselves, like, acceptable. According to who though, that's the thing, right? It's the larger, the larger society is telling you, you know, what, what's good about you and what's not good about you and, and when you're young you really take that on. You believe all of that, but the pressure is there all the way through. And, and I find that in midlife it, it just emerges even more. Like there's so many things that we could do, we can do and, and a lot of women do do to change themselves. As opposed to accepting themselves and not, I guess enhancing but in, in a natural way.


Like, going back to Cannabis. Cannabis can enhance how you feel and it's in a natural way. It can enhance how you sleep. It can enhance, you know, your sex life. It can enhance all of these things, and it's natural. The idea of like having tools that serve you so that when you get up in the morning, you're, and you look in the mirror, you're, you're happy to be there. You know, you're happy to, to be able to face, not face, but to live another day and, and do your purpose work and, you know, be the parent that you wanna be. Be the mom you wanna be, be the wife, the colleague, the partner, the the CEO that you wanna be, so that, yeah, you can serve the world and do, do the things you're here to do.


But if we're being told, no, you are not acceptable unless you look like this or you're not acceptable unless you're this weight, or me personally, I don't really listen to that anymore, but I know that the pressures are, are there and they're very, very powerful and they're very convincing. It prevents people in general from really embracing and, and, and loving who they are and, and stepping into their own sense of self-worth and, and all of that. Do you know what I mean? 


Candy: Absolutely. I love that you wrote this book. I think it is so incredibly important for women really, of all ages. I am not, I'm 38, so I'm not quite there, but I am on my way and a lot of the things that you've talked about that I've read in the book so far, I relate to so much. Like, I, you know. I decided early on to, to stop caring what everyone thought and to, to be authentic to myself. But, but it takes a while to get there. And your book is something that I think can really encourage women to say, oh, wait, hold on a second. I, I don't have to feel bad about myself all the time. 


So, one thing I wanted to ask you is how has your connection with your daughter changed with you being where you're at with your age and she being where she's at with her age?


Kim: Well, teenage, raising a teenager is not easy. Um, we have our, we have our lovely moments and we have our challenges when our, you know, she's got her headphones on and in the same room and just pretends I'm not there, or you know, there's these sorts of things that hurt my soul a little bit.


But I think that, that we're both in a place where we can understand each other a little bit better, though I have to, I have to kind of inform her. She doesn't always pick up on what I'm experiencing, whereas I, because I've already lived through my teenage years, I know what she's going through. 


We have really interesting talks around, um, you know, pe, her peer group and that kind of thing, and, and, and different concerns that kids are going through these days and living with. Like kids being medicated for different reasons and um, struggling with their own identities and, you know, doing a lot of experimentation.


But, you know, when I reflect back on my teenage years in the 80’s, the experimentation was, was more with the aesthetic, the outside, right? So, how you would dress, how you would wear your hair, all of that, the makeup, all of that. And now it's, it's so radically different because kids are being, kids are exploring in, in, in really extreme kinds of ways and going so far as to, you know, want gender re-identification and all of that stuff.


Yeah, it's really interesting because I find that, like with the whole pronouns, all of the pronouns conversation, like I will accidentally call someone she, because I've always known that person to be she, and then I discover that now they're he or they're they, and I'm, and she gets a little bit upset with me because I'll use the wrong pronoun about somebody and I have to explain like, I'm not used to this. This is not something that I've gone through before. Like, for example, one of her high school friends is a student who I used to teach and when I taught this child, this person, this person was she, and now this person is he. And so I have to, you know, navigate all of this and I find it hard, and I never want to be, come across as insulting or insensitive or anything like that, it's just, it's famil - it's unfamiliar territory. And she's trying to educate me on what her peers and her, you know, are going through and all of that when I have really no frame of reference for that. That's an interesting piece that we talk about, uh, pretty often. I'd say that's one of the, one of the more frequent conversations that we have because I will, like I said, inadvertently use the wrong pronoun and she gets upset and ‘cause she, she wants people to, of course, feel comfortable expressing themselves as who they choose to be. And I, I, I can understand that. I get that, but it's a, it's a new level of complexity that's facing kids these days. 


Like, I think your little guy is quite a bit younger, right? So maybe you're not…


Candy: Five.


Kim: Okay. Yeah. So maybe , you're not there yet with…


Candy: I'm not, I'm not, but I, I think it's lovely that, that our children, they teach us all the time. We're always learning from them. Especially with, you know, the world is constantly changing and the things that we were looking at our parents saying, hello, why would you say that? Or how did, you know what I mean? Um, we are now learning that things change. Things are changing, things are, yeah, moving along. So, I love that you have those open conversations with her about that.


Kim: I, I do wanna be as open with her as possible. And that's, you know, back to the Cannabis again, um, I've never hidden it from her. I've always, always been open and as I was learning about it, I would tell her some things even though she was 12, but I still wanted her to be exposed to it and be educated about it because inevitably it, it will show up in her peer groups and it already has.


And so she understands it and she, you know, if someone's having, if, if one of her, her friends is consuming and they're having an experience, then she understands what's going on and I feel that she's more adequately prepared for potentially uncomfortable situations because of what she knows. So, she's, she sees me making infusions and different edibles and, and sometimes after consuming I get very, very chatty and she'll say, mom, did you just smoke? Yeah. 


Candy: And I think it's such an important conversation to have, right? To educate your children, especially in their teenagehood, because, I mean, I am sure most people who are listening to this experienced that when they were teenagers. I know I did. It was, it was everywhere. So, I feel like it would've been really nice to actually understand it.


Kim: Yeah, well, and I can speak to her too about Cannabis versus alcohol, ‘cause she's, she's tried alcohol socially and she's had some not so good experiences and you know, she's, uh, live and learn ultimately, but at least she feels comfortable telling me about how, you know, she was at a party and she threw up and all the lovely stories, you know, that emerged from this phase of life.


She's able to talk to me and tell me about it. I, I don't think that I would've been so open and, and, uh, forthright with my mom about the experimentation that I was doing when I was 16 years old. Like, it didn't feel safe for me to do that. And plus my dad was a police officer, so I didn't really feel that, that I could open up about, you know, what I was, what my peers were doing, what I was doing, you know, ‘cause we all, we all experiment with a few things here and there when we're young ‘cause this is how we learn. 


Yeah. She tells me that she's often the one that will take people's keys and say, no, you're not driving. Wait. So that's good to know. She's got a good head on her shoulders. 


Candy: So, you had mentioned here and in your book that you went through a substantial health crisis. Do you wanna talk more about what happened? 


Kim: Yeah, so I mentioned that it was a result of the way I was doing my life, like overburdening myself and such and I'll try to nutshell this as much as I can. Basically, it was early June in school and I was, you know, prepping for the end of the year doing report cards, all of that stuff, and at the same time enduring a, a pain that showed up.


I went to see my doctor about it, and he didn't know exactly what the cause was or what it was, what was happening. So, he sent me for a series of tests and as I was organizing these tests and scheduling them into the summer, the pain was intensifying and, and I was taking medication to cope with that and still going to work. Still going to work. Um, and I ended up finishing the school year, but in a very, in a, a very uncomfortable way. 


We finished school with kids and then we would have two organizational days just to wrap up the year with meetings and clean up and all of that. And I was still showing up for those too. But my colleague had said to me, uh, she said, Kim, this isn't normal. Like, what you're going through right now is not normal. You need to take yourself to the emergency room. And so this sounded like a very foreign concept to me, that you take yourself to the emergency room. I thought only, like, there's gotta be big accidents or something to take you to the emergency room. So, but I took her advice and I went and, and 10 hours later, um, I finally saw a doctor who through um, ultrasound, discovered that there was a mass on my left side, like in the area of my left ovary. And because there was some insight into what was going on, um, I was then scheduled to see a Gynecological specialist who worked primarily with women with ovarian cancer. 


And so, uh, I saw him and he did his examination, and immediately after that said, we're booking you into a hospital tomorrow and you're having surgery the next day. Like, so rapid, yet I had endured several weeks of this pain and not knowing what was going on and just showing up because I felt obligated, like it's the end of the year. Who can do my report cards for me? Nobody can replace me at this time, and I just dealt with it and powered through, but so much pain. Like, brutal pain. 


Anyhow, after surgery, I woke up and, and, uh, discovered that there was a lot more going on. I, I had actually had an infection, a massive infection, and it just got worse and worse as, as I delayed getting support for it or, or as I, I didn't really delay, like I, I sought support. There was just no concrete answer as to what was going on until they had me in surgery and could see what was going on.


So, I woke up to discover that I had a complete hysterectomy. So, uterus, tubes, ovaries, cervix, complete, and totally hysterectomy, as well as, uh, they had to take my appendix and a section of my lower intestine. And because of that, the intestinal piece, uh, I woke up with an ileostomy bag. And that's the last thing that you expect when you go in for what I thought was going to be a quick surgery to just remove this mass. Do a biopsy, find out if it's anything that I should really be worried about, but it, it ended up being so much more.


There was no cancer, thank goodness, but living with an ileostomy bag was really, really hard. And, and being shot right into menopause as well was really challenging. So, the ileostomy bag, for people who don't know what that is, it's basically, it's not the prettiest thing, but it's what replaces your digestive system when your digestive system is compromised. So, a lot of people who have conditions like Crohn's, colitis, you know, they've often experienced an ileostomy or a colostomy bag. Um, it's what collects the solid waste from what you eat. And with mine, because it was so high up on my small intestine, my digestive system was really shortened to the point where I wasn't getting any nutrition from the food that I was eating. And when I talked to my doctor about this and was like trying to adjust things in my diet to slow down, slow down the digestive rate so that there could be some absorption. He just told me to drink more protein shakes, and I was like, are you kidding me? Protein shakes, like that's not gonna do anything. And I ended up dropping weight. I was 107 pounds at my lowest and I'm six feet tall, so I was very, very, very thin and my muscle mass decreased ‘cause I was in hospital for three weeks doing nothing. Like, in a hospital bed for three weeks being fed through a PICC line into my neck and, you know, no solid food.


The only thing I could take through my, like orally was I could chew on ice. That's all I was allowed to consume because they didn't want to disrupt my, in my digestive system at all in the early stages after surgery. But yeah, that weight loss and the decrease in my ability to do pretty much anything really debilitated me.


I learned face yoga a year later. I discovered face yoga a year later. And you might be thinking, what does that have to do with it? When you lose a lot of weight, it really does something to your face and my uh, I'm already quite thin, tall, and lean, but I had lost so much weight that it, like, I had almost like a skeletal looking face and my confidence, like everything just went, just went.


And I didn't wanna go outside. I didn't wanna people, I didn't want people to see me. I was really impacted psychologically by how I looked because it was kind of fear inducing to people. ‘Cause one story that I have is, um, my, a new neighbour that I had met just as I was, um, coming out of the hospital. And that would've been in August of 2016. He didn't say anything at the time, but later we chatted after I was well. I had, I had had the second surgery and the bag was removed and all of that. Um, he said to me, I thought you were like, you had cancer. I thought you were gonna die. I thought, like that, his first impression of me was, one of something's wrong. Something's extremely wrong with this woman, and he didn't say anything then because, you know, sensitive topic. But later when he said that to me, I was like, wow. Like, I really had that impact on people. And so it kept me, it kept me inside a lot when I was recovering, when I was back home after, after the first surgery, just not wanting people to, to see me and then dealing with, with menopause.


I think that initially I, I didn't even notice that I was going through it because I was in so much struggle with everything else, with being so weak and with being so thin and I ended up seeing a Naturopath ultimately and getting intravenous vitamin therapy so that I could have some nutrition going into my body because blood tests were showing that all of my levels were really low.


And it's just like, wast - literally like wasting away waiting for a phone call from the hospital, let's say, come back, you're ready for your second surgery. Your bowel has had enough time to heal. So I was waiting and waiting for that call and that finally came and it, that changed everything. And as soon as I got my system back, my digestive system back, I started to put on weight.


I started to normalize again, but I had to rebuild my body. I had to, I had to, you know, slowly get back into moving my body and, and, um, bring back flexibility and strength and, and all of that. It was like a complete, like starting over.


Candy: Like, where are you now? How do you feel now that it's been how many years now since the surgery?


Kim: Coming up seven, which I can hardly believe. 2016. Yeah. So, I'm good now. Yeah. Show you my muscles. Yeah, everything is good. And what's interesting, I was talking with a friend the other day. I don't take any hormones. I don't take any hormones, like my levels, my blood tests, the last ones I had showed that all my levels were fine, which I find interesting because when you don't have ovaries, you're just not producing hormones at the same, uh, the same rate as you did before, right? I think it's probably time for me to go for some follow up tests and just see where I'm at. With that said, like, I, I feel normal, whatever normal is, I feel fine. I, I sleep well. I have energy, like, I don't feel depleted or like I'm debilitated in any way.


A little bit of joint pain now and again, but you know, I've got a 53 year old body that I'm living in and the wear and tear of life. I use my topicals for that and, and it helps. But yeah, everything is good. Very grateful to be able to say that because a lot of women have gone through hysterectomy and, you know, when you lose your entire system like that, it, it, it does a lot physically. Yeah, I'm, I'm fortunate that I'm fine. At least I feel fine. I mean, I'm not digging into my innards and, and  and seeing if things are okay in there, but generally speaking, the way that I feel says to me that I'm fine physiologically. But yeah.


Actually, what I would like to look into is the bioidentical hormones and getting those through natural sources, I'm gonna be pursuing that because there's, there's foods that you can eat that are high in different hormones, right? I just don't know a lot about that, so that's probably something I should add to my learning for 2023, because I, I really, I'm not someone who takes medication. I don't, if I don't have to, I don't, I won't. Um, so I would much rather something natural. I'm all about natural. 


Candy: So, what are you currently working on? 


Kim: I am currently exploring the idea of doing a co-authored book. So, Midlife Magic is one of three books that I've already done this year. I did an accompanying journal and I recently did a colouring book, an adult colouring book for women that I call a women's self-care retreat.


I, I feel like that rounds out the Cannabis self-care coaching through books. And so, you know, all of that. But then I got the idea a while, um, like maybe six months ago to bring out more stories. Like, I'm one person with my story, my Cannabis associated story, but there are so many others. Right? And I felt, like call, I felt called to somehow figure out a way to get these stories out, and I've been exploring this idea of a co-authored book, and I think it will happen. I'm hoping it will happen. Just working out some of the, the smaller details, but just looking for others who are interested in sharing the stories of their own personal transformations thanks to, with thanks to their relationship with Cannabis because I think that is one of the, the key ways that will help to change attitudes and reduce the stigma that's out there. Impact laws, you know, the, the more that people are aware of the impact, the positive impact of this plant on, on people's lives, the more it's going to have credibility and, and people will, more people will start to turn to it and, and turn away from the more addictive options out there, like opioids, right? And, and all the pharmaceuticals that just keep people stuck in a, in a loop of, you know, treating the, the symptom and then treating the side effect that the medication caused. And all of that craziness that, that has become essentially normal for a lot of people. 


You know, women's stories of, of healing and transformation with Cannabis and bringing that story together so, we'll see. I'm looking for hopefully around 2025 contributors who will, who are interested in sharing their stories, but also, uh, like writing it themselves, but with the support of someone who's gone through the process. And having been a teacher for such a long time, I've taught so many kids how to work on their writing and their, their voice as a writer and, and all of that.


Um, so that's a big project that I’m looking forward to doing and also working more in the coaching realm and supporting women, uh, in midlife, just with the tool, with the tools that I have to share. That's something else that I hope to be doing ‘cause I haven't done much of, of that and I shared why earlier, but I'm not in that fear, like what are people gonna think  or what are my bosses gonna think or my administrators gonna think ‘cause I don't have to worry about them. I don't have them anymore. They're not part of the present moment. 


I met someone on the weekend or last week who was very much aligned with me in terms of looking at different mental health and wellbeing approaches for youth. As a mom of a teenager, and I talked about some of the things that teens are going through these days and all of that, and being, having been a teacher for such a long time, I, I, I still feel this call to work with, with kids and I know that they're dealing with a lot.


And so it was just sort of divine intervention that I met this person who has a similar idea and we've been meeting and we've had dinner together to talk more about formulating a vision and what, what we can do to help bring our expertise together and, and support kids who really need it. Right? And, and maybe not just kids, but other people who struggle with their mental health and so we'll see. 


There's a few things that are on the, that are on the horizon. We'll see. I I, I'm one of those people who gets very interested in a lot of different things and I can go down many a rabbit hole. It was a rabbit hole that led me to Cannabis. So, yeah. 


Candy: So, what books are you currently reading? 


Kim: One of the books that I'm reading is The Myth of Normal by Gabor Mate, and it looks at, um, the subtitle is trauma, illness, and healing in a toxic culture. And I've read other books by him, um, well, one other book by him, When The Body Says No -


Candy: I'm currently reading that.  


Kim: Yeah. And I, that, that one spoke to me because I had this question about what was it that caused me to get so sick? What, what was it? And in reading, When The Body Says No, it opened me up more to this understanding of how stress manifests as illness in the body and how, how, how we bring on our own illnesses. Yeah, it's, it's quite a fascinating thing to think about actually, ‘cause you don't wanna be saying like, I made myself sick. But that's, that's the truth of it. We make ourselves sick. So, I'm reading that one and I'm also reading about Psychedelic Cannabis. I'm interested in, uh, and this is again, talks about trauma and transforming consciousness. Ever since getting ill and not understanding why, fully why I got ill. I've had these questions like, why did, why did this happen to me and how did I do this to myself? And because I have a relationship now with Cannabis and I understand it so well, it makes sense to explore it with this psychedelic approach. That's, that's an area that I am getting more interested in is the power of psychedelics. So I've just, I, that was a gift to myself for Christmas and it just arrived. And I'm excited to dig into that one. 


Candy: Awesome. And what music are you listening to this week? 


Kim: Okay, so I just found out last week that, um, one of the musicians that I've been following for probably 20 or more years is coming to town!


Candy: Exciting!


Kim: And I haven't seen him play since, uh, I think it was about seven years ago. No, let me think. It was before I got sick. It was 2015. 2015 was the last time he came through Calgary. So, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I got my ticket. I'm gonna go see him and his name is Alejandro Escovedo and he's, uh, quite, quite an interesting individual who, you know, during the, the height of the punk rock era in the 80’s when they were, you know, Sid and Nancy of the Sex Pistols, and they were living in the Chelsea Hotel in New York. He was living in the Chelsea Hotel in New York at the same time, and he had this wild band called The Nuns and he's, he's gone from that to more alt country. I mean, he's pretty old now. He's, he's in his later 60’s, I think. But a tremendous artist and performer and such a wonderful human. I've had the pleasure of meeting him and I'm excited to see him again.


So,  he's actually, do you know who Sheila E. is? 


Candy: Yes, yes. 


Kim: Yeah. She played with Prince. She's the percussionist who played with, yeah. Um, he is her uncle. 


Candy: Oh wow. 


Kim: Yeah. So Sheila E. The E is Escovedo, which is his last name. Alejandro Escovedo. Yeah. So he comes out, he's from Texas. Yeah. He'll be here in three weeks, I think. End of January. So I'm listening to him. I'm going through the, the discography to refresh my, my memory of his wonderful music, ‘cause it's been a while. 


Candy: So what brings you joy? 


Kim: What brings me joy? One thing that brings me a lot of joy that I have not had the opportunity to do lately is travel. Yeah. I, I used to travel quite a lot. Our last trip was to Iceland in 2019. You know, before everything, before everything happened, we were in Iceland. And um, before that we had a, an amazing trip to New York City, and I shared that we lived in South America. Travel is something that has been a key piece of my, my life, um, ever since I was a young adult.


And actually it's partly what guided me to pursue teaching as a career because I knew I would be guaranteed two solid months every year to go somewhere. And, uh, I, I do miss it quite a bit, but, um, hopefully that will change. 


So, travel brings me joy when I can't travel. I like to have sort of unique experiences that would make me feel as though I've gone somewhere else. So, trying different restaurants and different foods and I really enjoy Latin dance. That's something that, that I got into a while ago and haven't really participated much because of, you know, all of the shutdowns and things, but things are coming back. So, hopefully I'll be doing some salsa dancing and enjoying some, some more socializing and, and connecting with more people and, and all of that. ‘Cause that's what's, that's what's really joyful and fun. 


And I also enjoy baking as a, and, and that connects with self-care. Not that I get to consume everything that I eat. I like to share it. I used to bake as a kid because I loved to eat the, the final product, but now it's more about experimentation. I like to make different edibles and things like that, but just being in that zone of just so, so mindful and, and focused on an activity that everything else kind of melts away and, and you end up with this delicious treat at the end. So, that's always good. 


It's always fun and getting outside, doing some little bit of sport here and there. I just discovered the game of paddle. It's a racket sport. It's like playing tennis on a shortened court, but it's tennis merged with racquetball I guess, ‘cause the ball can hit off the wall and then you can continue keeping it in play. So, I was a tennis player, quite an active tennis player, but it's just not as fun as it used to be. Like, it's hard on my shoulder and all of that, so it, paddle is a lot more gentle. It's kind of like pickleball if people have heard of pickleball, it's similar ‘cause the shorter court, and it's not quite the season right now for it, too much snow. But hopefully in the spring I'll get back to that. It's fun. 


Candy: I really appreciate you being here and sharing your story and talking about all the really awesome things that you're doing. I'm currently reading your book and I'm currently waiting for, uh, Amazon to ship me your colouring book, so - 


Kim: Oh, yay!


Candy: I've seen it everywhere. Everyone is, like, advertising it and so excited about it, and so you definitely have a community of people who, um, who love the work that you're doing and who wanna share it with the world. So thank you so much. 


Kim: Thank you. Thank you. That's exciting. The highly inspired self-care retreat. Yes. 


Candy: Thank you so much for being here. I really appreciate you. 


Kim: Thank you. Appreciate you too. It's been fun.